And just like that...

It all started much like most things do; a seemingly distant dream. The dream, while rosy, did not consider the distance that one would have to travel even to get to the starting line. A long laborious road ensued. Then, as the flowers blossomed radiantly one final time before grudgingly yielding to autumn, we made our way to the City.

The City was vibrant, as at any time of the year. Skeptical faces surveyed through the conundrum, looking for familiarity in an expansive sea of the unknown. Enthusiasm ran high, as did the tabs at every conceivable bar in the neighborhood. Ever as slowly through the mist appeared, half a pint at a time, the new kids of the block.

The unknown beat a hasty retreat to accommodate the evolving bonds. Time flew by in the blink of an eye. The first act was on and the appearances changed to suit the occasion. While the circles remained, content was conspicuous by its absence. The mission: not to kill, but rather to not be killed. The alcohol had quickly sunk, allowing the water to float above. While conversations were aplenty, interest was left at the door. The song and dance was quite elaborate, just as the wine and cheese were cheap.

As time passed by, the race was getting clear. While the thoroughbreds pulled through to gain a lead, the also-rans watched with a sense of awe and bewilderment. Nevertheless, in true Hollywood-esque manner, the odd dark horse nudged through the crowd to make it a true photo finish. While the winners painted the town red, the mere mortals were left to clean the mess. Lessons were learnt and backs were broken. It was the inevitable truth and yet none of it was spoken. While many chose to blend into the background, a chosen few rose through the ashes, a phoenix at a time.

Elsewhere, the Trojan horses snuck through the gate, the guard opening his eyes too late. The enemy emerged from within the Trojan, attacking all in sight with toxic waste. And as they attacked the heel of Achilles, the mighty fell one at a time. The king saw the writing on the wall, change was plotting a mighty fall. The world as we knew it saw change; we doubled as unpaid targets at the shooting range.

When we thought we weathered the storm, another one rocked the boat. Life has taught us many a lesson, none as many as the time here. There was suspense; there was drama, a pinch of romance and some action. Why, there even was an elaborate Bollywood song and dance. Preached we were by the god and the soothsayer. We even learnt that greed is good. Some made us laugh, some made us weep. Some made us listen, others put us to sleep.

We look at the mirror, where we are today. We reflect on how things were two years back. And we notice the change. Change beyond just the debt and the long list of Facebook friends. Change in the attitude and the knowledge. Change in the attitude towards life. A few friends made for life. The number of bars visited in NYC. Change was the flavor of the season and that is what we saw.

Along the last mile, few moments away from walking down the river quay, we wonder whether it was a good dream, a nightmare or just another two years of life. The answer would be different for each of us. In many ways, it may be all of the above. All we know is that we spent a good time of our life here and had a great time whilst doing so. We leave with a mixed emotion of exhilaration and disappointment. Like all great journeys, this too has come to an end. It started one windy morning in August… and just like that, it will all be over.

I want to fly

Picture Source: vancouverisland.travel

Every day I want to fly
Stay by my side
Every day I want to dream
Stay by my side

Every morning I wish
I could just play
Wish the mornings
would just stay

Every day I want to cry
Stay by my side
Every day I want to try
Stay by my side

Every morning I wish
I could just sing
Wish the bells
would just never ring

Every day I want to smile
Stay by my side
Every day I want to laugh
Stay by my side

Every morning I wish
I could just write
Wish the end
would be in sight

Every day I want to fly
Stay by my side
Every day I want to dream
Stay by my side

- Adapted by Max from a jingle by Vodafone

Video Source: Vodafone through youtube.com
- One of the most beautiful and pleasing commercials that I have seen.

I have a dream

Picture Courtesy: www.wikipedia.org

Martin Luther King Jr. once said very famously:
'I have a dream that my four little children will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by the color of their skin, but by the content of their character.'. He worked for the rights of the Black people of the United States of America and probably the world.

Even he would probably not have dreamt that one day, a black person would rise to become the President of the United States. Today, with the election of Barack Obama as the next President, the obvious and yet unlikely has been achieved.

Picture Courtesy: TIME magazine archives

Kudos to Obama for having dreamt this day and working towards it. Kudos to the American public for having helped him realize this dream.

I will probably never forget the incident that occurred this evening as the news of Barack Obama winning trickled in. After having watched most of the results at Murphy and Gonsalez near NYU, we were walking towards the PATH station to get back home. Apparently, in between our exit and this moment, Barack Obama had won enough seats to be declared as the winner. People were rejoicing in their homes, balconies and in the streets.

An African American person approached us as we were waiting at the corner of 9th and 5th. He exclaimed "Do you know what color is Barack Obama?". We didn't know what to say and how to react, having been caught off-guard. Before we would react, he provided the obvious answer "BLACK!". He continued "A Black person is now the President of the United States".

As he walked into the night, happy with the outcome, I realized how much this victory meant for the African American community of this country. I realized how much this country had progressed since the times of MLK Jr.

While time alone will tell whether Obama is a good president or not, one thing is for certain: Martin Luther King Jr.'s dream has finally come true.

Parting Notes
#1 - I am a Republican.
#2 - I cannot vote.
#3 - I do not matter.
#4 - I hope that things do turn out well.
#5 - God Bless America
#6 - Jai Maharashtra!

Mera Mustaqbil

This is a dab at a few verses in Urdu. This is in a state of flux and is likely to expand at a later stage.

Photo Courtesy: www.gannonandbenjamin.com

andhere ke sannaate ko choor karte
savere ek nayaa sooraj nikala
iss naye daur ki roshni mein
andekha sa hua pichli raat ka masla

tujhse hai yahee meri iltejaa
aye moula aye mere khudaa
manzil hai saamne mere
mustaqbil se ab naa kar judaa

manzil hai saamne mere
mustaqbil se ab naa kar judaa

- Miyan Max

The future

Its been a hectic week...and it has ended with two sleepless nights [1.5 hrs in the last 48]. It has been a lot of my favorite topic of the semester. It has been a lot of what I want to do going ahead... Corporate Finance, Excel modeling and estimating the value of a company [in my case, LVMH - Louis Vuitton Moet Hennessy]

It's been an interesting journey through all of this. Nevertheless, the most gratifying piece is the knowledge, realization and ratification that I am pursuing a dream that is exactly in line with my goals.

Looks like I am indeed fit for banking! Be it the two straight nights of no sleep or the decisive handling of the model, I believe I got it right!

What dreams are made of...

Each and everyone of us are like the fingers of our hands...different!
Put 10 people in a room and you will get an exhaustive list of likes and dis-likes, thoughts and opinions and a truck-load of talent! You would find someone who can dance like Jennifer Lopez, sing like Mariah Carey, write like Ayn Rand, entertain an audience like Jay Leno...well almost! You would need these people in person to get that kind of talent! But you know where I am getting at...
As I have mentioned in one of my earlier blogs...I think that I lie at the other end of the said spectrum. This may sound real low on self confidence..but it is not! Until a few years back, I thought that i was a realist(if there is such a thing in the Oxford dictionary)...someone who thought realistically about things and did not have an optimistic or a pessimistic view point. But then I realised (life is a great tutor in many respects...) that it wasn't doing any good for my self confidence!
And life is ALL about ATTITUDE!

Your attitude defines your thought process.It drives what you want to do and what you actually end up doing. And so it gives a person the defining edge to rise above mediocrity and move towards excellence! And when you break the journey up into smaller steps...it doesn't look any steep anymore! It is do-able!
I have charted many a personal victories using this thought in mind and it has reaped huge benefits for me.
Well..back to the topic at hand. I ain't the most talented guy in this side of the town. But I try hard not to lose an opportunity when I am given one...For they are like an old man's teeth...Few...and far in between.
This is a simple story of one such opportunity!
One of my previous blogs had a comment that I can sing to disperse a crowd...and that this talent(???)can be used in a tense situation to break up a mob!
One night has changed that outlook...
Something like a week back, we received a mail from the admin for my team asking me whether I wanted to be a part of the group which was planning on singing the carols for the office Christmas/Year end party.
Yes! You read that right! I was asked whether I wanted to join the office choir. It had always been an unfulfilled dream for me that I sing to an audience...that was willingly listening. And that when I would open my eyes at the end of it all, there would be someone listening to me!
While I saw this as an opportunity, i was sceptical. I didn't know how it would all turn out. And whether I would make a fool of myself! ALL my friends have always been critical of my attempts at singing. And I guess that made me think 100 times before I sang. Singing for me was something that was done only in the confines of the bathroom, under the shower. But i went nevertheless! For I knew that Lady Luck ain't coming knocking to your door twice.
There were quite a few people there for the practices. And I wondered...would I be any good? Would I be decent enough not to make a fool of myself? It wasn't a case of self doubt. It was more like the Truth for me. When you hear day and night that Surf Excel can get rid of all stains, you start believing them! Similarly you start believing people when they tell you time and again that singing is NOT my cup of coffee (I dont drink tea... :->).
Well, back to the choir practices. On an average, 3 out of 4 people were regular choir singers or those who had sung in a choir before. And they were good!
I passed through two days without a lot of trouble. Missed a thing here and a few things there...but all in all, it was a good experience! I decided to stay in the shadow of another guy named Satya. He has a wonderful voice and I would sing in his shadow, by his side. He would mellow...so would I. He would stop, so would I. We were told in the first few days that his was the 'better' voices and that we had to support him. A few of those present didnt exactly like that and hence they politely excused themselves. But I decided to persist! There was a goal in mind. I wasnt thinking about the choir. I was selfishly thinking about myself. I wanted to do it for myself! As the practices progressed, I heard a lot of terms: 'tone', 'alto', 'melody', 'harmony'...while I theoretically had a vague idea of what they meant, I didn't have a clue as to what they sounded like. I couldn't tell one from the other. For that matter, I couldn't tell one from itself! Everything was Greek and German as far as I was concerned. And it was amusing to me when every once in a while, everyone (besides me)threw their hands up in the air screaming that we were one 'note' higher/lower and that we weren't sounding right. Turned out that i was the only member of the Les Ignorants contingent out there. I now emphatised with Joey Tribbiani. The way he would try to act like he was on the same page as the others whilst in the middle of a intellectual conversation...when actually he was so far away from the line...that he couldn't even see the line. I decided that the shut mouth policy was the best policy. In the middle of all this, there were some interesting turns and twists to the carols.
The turning point came when the guys were asked to sing all by themselves to get the notes(??? I am not sure whether that is the right word) right. In the middle of the all guy-song sequence, one of the girls doing the melody (no idea what it means...guess will have to google for it...) said that i should do 'seconds' for a particular sequence. I said that I didnt know what the hell she was talking about. She made all of us sing again...and then exclaimed that i was indeed doing seconds. Since we were not doing well that day, i thought that it was me who was screwing it up. When I asked her if that was the case, she said that it was something good. Something else came up and as a result of the same, I had to let go of the same.
The next day however, the same thing came up again.The director(that is what we all her fondly!) suddenly exlaimed that I was doing the thing that i was doing...seconds. That is when the melody girl said that I have been doing it for a while....without knowing what I was upto. I was scared know...I thought that i was really screwing it up. That is when they said that what i was doing was actually something good! I couldn't believe my ears!
I asked them...'Excuse me???'
They said...'Exghacttly'
Well, actually it wasnt Exghacttly like how i said it...but I bet that you get the drift!
As I always do, I started fishing for compliments! I wanted to know what it was that they meant. They told me that it was something that was tough to do...something like melody and harmony..and that if I was doing it spontaneously, it was something great! And that i was to continue to do what i doing (unknowlingly of course!).
Later in the evening, when it was sound check time, we (atleast me) were going terribly off! I guess I was getting conscious...I have done atleast 10 skits/dramas etc on stage...even danced once on stage...but a song was a first! The butterflies in the stomach were obvious! All the attitude and the self-confidence went for a toss. I was asked to stand all by myself at the end of a semi circle that we boys(that is what the girls were calling us) were standing in. I thought it was because I wasnt doing well. It was only later that i realised that this was actually because i was throwing someone else off the track!
Let me try to explain the concept of a second voice as I have understood it with my limited music knowledge(sorry to have kept harping on the lack of musical know-how. it is just that everyone other than me seems to know more about music... :-> ). When a person is singing in a second voice, what he/she is actually singing a note lower than the rest of the group. This is supposedly akin to swimming against the tide. To sing in tune, but a note lower than the rest is something that isn't easy is something that I am told(please correct me if any of this is incorrect).
Since I was singing at a different note, i was throwing another guy off the track. Hence he needed to be alongside someone else so that he remained in scope.
The sound checks were chaotic. We just didnt seem to get the sequence right. And before we could test anymore, the first of the buses carrying the people arrived and people started trickling into the InterContinental lawns. We decided to pack up and change into our gear.
Us guys were doing blazers and were looking neat. But the girls were simply stunning. Each and everyone of them! They seemed to provide just the right kinda motivation! ;) And they had our attention...hook, line and sinker!
I know had another reason to perform well! ;)
The scheduled time was 2000 IST...but in the fine tradition of Indian Stretchable Time, it was pushed by 30 mins...and we were getting impatient...so were the people! We had lovely Santa caps on! And they were lookin simply stunning! All of us had champagne and sparkling wine...and that seemed to give us the push that we needed...
We started with Joy to the world! It was a loud and a strong song(description was provided by the director). The papillons in the belly had been long gone! Whether it was because of the champagne, the new found confidence or the stunning ladies, I don't know. But they were gone for sure!
I sang with a lot of fervour. It was my 20 minutes of glory. A dream long overdue was finally being fulfilled. I sang my heart out. I guess that my emotions could be heard in my voice. It was like a one-day match debut for a cricketer or clearing the Engineering graphics paper for a first year engineering student! We soon moved to peppier songs like Santa Claus is comin' to town, Jingle Bell Rock and Jingle Bells
When it was all done, it was like the end of a dream! It wasnt that i desperately wanted or something. You have to understand that! All of us have this list of things that we want to do in a lifetime...BASE jumping, para-gliding, writing a book of my own...This was a part of that list...I guess that i just didnt have the confidence to do it! And never had more that half an opportunity any which way.

At the end of the day, it was a lesson well learnt! Nothing is impossible in life...One just has to do it the right way. One should have faith in oneself. And you should not try to ape someone else. You should do what you are good at..and be good at it. If I had tried to ape Satya or do something different, I reckon that i would have screwed it up. All of us have some talents. Its just that some of them are hidden. We have to understand the meaning of the word 'hidden' and try to find them...And the most important of them all...Always follow your what your heart tells you and try to achieve what you dream of!
I think that it was a one hell of a learning for one night!

PS: In case I have sounded like I am boasting or if you found the post to be lacking of modesty, I apologise. But, you have to understand the thought process and excitement that has gone into the writing of this post! And the underlying sentiments involved. You have to understand HOW much it means to me...
thanks...APS

CAT...Since 2003

Somewhere deep inside all of us lies a cute kid...he shows his face once in a while and makes us do something that we always wanted to do...but never had the chance to...maybe because we never had the time (although we had time to land at Mocha...and bide time over a vertigo), maybe because we didn't want it bad enough...or simply because we never had the will to let it happen...
And when he (the kid) does pop-up, the urge to do the unconventional is so strong...you think that you can conquer the world...well almost.

A certain such urge has cropped up in my mind..again...
I always cribbed to God that he didnt give me talents...
I aint much of a dancer, can sing to disperse a crowd and paint a cow when i want a frog and vice-versa. If there is something that i can do decently, it is to write...(or should i be saying type).
Or so i console myself!

well...enough of the abstract...Let me get into the crux of the matter...

I always wanted to script a short story...something that was close to my heart...
Something with which i could talk my heart out...and something that others would relate to and want to listen.

But there wasnt anything that i could place my finger on. Then, a fine day, a dear friend asked me whether I had read 5 point Someone by Chetan Bhagat. I pleaded ignorance. What caught my attention was an innocuous statement by her that although the book was decent enough, given the chance, I could do a better job!

The very next day, I had bought the book and read the same(The first page of the book bears testimony to the above mentioned incident). It was good. But then, i thought that it didn't deserve the hype.

And one statement kept ringing in my mind
"...you can do a better job than him...".

And now, I have an opportunity to live that dream...
I have an idea!

I present to you...

CAT...Since 2003!!!
:-)
This happens to be the name and the subject of the short story that i intend to pen...
It is a touchy and memorable topic to all those amongst us who came to Pune with a dream...A dream of the IIMs!

When we embarked on the journey, we were quite a handful. However, since then, we have meandered and taken our own paths. Some have moved on and some have moved out. But the CAT of 2003 was agruably the best time of our lives...since then we have diligently(???) made efforts. But the dream of Vastrapore (for the ignoramus, the address of IIM-A reads IIM, Vastrapur, Ahmedabad) remains a dream...
But we haven't give up hope (or have we?). We continue in our efforts to rise to the pinnacle...
And this forms the crux of my story...
I dont intend to keep it auto-biographical...for two reasons...
one, life is weirder than fiction and hence difficult to digest...and two, i dont want to make my life a open book... ;-)
I want to keep people guessing as to what is fact and what is fiction (assuming i find someone brave enought to endure the same...in fact, considering you have reached this far, would you want to take the first shot? ;-> ).

I know the entire concept sounds like one crazy idea! But guess what???
Normal is boring!!!. Not that i am bored with life or anything of that sort...(or that i dont have work at Lehman...i write these at night),but the penchant of doing the unusual is definitely more rewarding than the mundane...

With this, i begin the wonderful journey of the dream!


CAT...since 2003!!!